I didn’t' want to keep living this way, with suffering. So I gathered the courage to face my fears head on and found a therapist to guide me on this journey of self-discovery. I’ve looked within myself in order to get to know myself, healed past wounds, and accessed my self-love. It's been a difficult yet rewarding journey.
I learned how to live in the present, found the courage to be true to myself, and in turn have created a life I love.
I now feel free - free from my old self, from what society or others expect from me, from trying to make others happy instead of myself, and free from my old story of being a victim.
Ever since I was young I've been physically active - horseback riding, soccer and basketball up to when I went to college. In college I fell into a depression, stopped exercising, started eating poorly, and gained almost 40 lbs. The way I treated myself at that time was a reflection of how I felt on the inside. After college I took up running in order to try to lose this weight. The first time I ran, I couldn’t run one mile without stopping 10 times. At first I hated it, yet I still did it in order to get fit. As a few weeks went by, I noticed how my resistance grew…I could now run 1 full mile without stopping. This is when my motivation and curiosity lit up. I decided to test my mind and body, so I signed up for a Half Marathon and I successfully completed it.
Since this first Half Marathon, I have ran countless Half Marathons, 2 Full Marathons (26.2 miles), and in the last 3 years have completed several triathlons including 2 Half IronMan Distance races (swimming, biking, and running for 70.3 miles).
Respect and Love for my body
If I treat it well, it responds well and keeps me feeling good.
Confidence & Trust in myself
I can achieve anything I set my mind to and work hard for.
Feeling strong emotionally and physically
A strong body = a strong mind.
Resilience
Trusting that if I fall, I can get myself up and keep on moving forward.
Courage
I can face any situation even if I'm afraid. Fear won't stop me.
Pride
In my growth, improvements and achievements. Pride in myself for not giving up even when things got tough.
These strengths are ones I not only have when I'm training and racing, but also ones that carry over into ALL ASPECTS OF MY LIFE.
This is where it all came together, the ultimate challenge - Self Acceptance in order to have SELF LOVE. After learning to love my mind and my body, I was able to love myself. I found out what I needed to do in order to love myself, as well as what self-care practices into my daily routine in order to stay in this space of self-love these practices include: walking my dog while listening to relaxing music, watching the sunrise or sunset, exercising 5-6 times a week, resting my body when it needs it, nourishing my body with foods that make it feel good, treating myself to chocolate and pizza weekly, spending time in nature, reading/listening to talks/podcasts which nourish my mind and soul, connecting with others, being present (putting my phone away) and listening to others, cuddling with my dog, creating something new, meditating before I sleep. As I've gotten to know myself more, I better understand what I need to do in order to remain feeling good, to take care of myself. And it's something I need to do every day - self-care. If I stop, after a few days I start to feel the emotional toll.
What I've learned throughout this journey is that by learning to love ourselves we can all CREATE A LIFE WE LOVE. A life where we fully accept and love ourselves, where we do the things we love to do and care for ourselves in order to feel good. I never imagined life didn't have to suck, that it was possible to feel good and be content with ourselves and our lives.
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