Lessons Learned from 2017
If I could sum up into one equation what I’ve learned and been able to truly experience this past year, it’s this:
Trust+ Gratitude + Change in Perspective+ Compassion = Sustainable Happiness.
Trust: By Trust I mean, letting go of wanting to control outcomes, control things and people in your life, control your self-invented “timeline”, and really Trust the Universe (or God, or whatever you believe in), that you are going through your current situation for a reason. Perhaps it’s to learn a lesson or to grow. Whatever the reason is, I promise you that you will look back upon this time, and realize that it all was all for the best. Even if you feel stuck or lost, some knowledge and gain will come from this moment. Just let go and trust. The less you resist, the more things flow.
Gratitude: Every day, think of your blessings, and feel true gratitude for all the great things in your life. Instead of thinking of all the things you WANT but DON’T HAVE, be grateful for the good things you DO HAVE. We often don’t value wonderful things, relationships, circumstances, blessings that we have because we are looking for more. If it helps you, make a list of all positives in your life. And make it a habit to be grateful each day. Gratitude also includes being grateful even for the challenges you may be going through. Related to trusting, is to be grateful for the teachings you are getting from these experiences.
Change in Perspective: This is a big one. It’s amazing how different our Feelings about a particular situation can be based on our perspective. And Yes, WE ARE IN CONTROL OF HOW WE FEEL ABOUT A CERTAIN SITUATION THAT OCCURS. We are the ones that label things as being good, or bad, and we are the ones that decide if things hurt us or not, if they are personal or not.
Compassion: This means compassion with yourself and with others. Not being hard on yourself, not being your biggest critic (which naturally we are). Being always graceful and kind to yourself, treating and talking to yourself as you would with your best friend. Also, being compassionate of others. This may be especially hard whenever we have interactions with people and they behave a certain way as a consequence of whatever hard time they’re dealing with. Yes, it does not excuse the way people act and treat you, and yes it may be annoying or hurtful, but just remember that they are battling their own demons. You are a person that’s more self-aware and ideally take responsibility for your actions and how you act toward others. But not everyone is this way. So just understand that whatever someone does/says to you, 99.9% of the time is NOT personal, but rather, just a reflection of their own internal shit. So try to take a deep breath, be compassionate, and let it go. Don’t let it hurt you in any way, because you’re the only one that loses if you do.
Sustainable Happiness: By first being aware of the latter and then trying to implement it into my daily life and daily thoughts, I have been able to experience sustainable happiness. By this I don’t mean that every day I am 100% in a happy mood, doing cartwheels in the sun with bunnies and puppies. Sustainable happiness for me means that I am at peace with myself, I’m in a place of awareness and mindfulness, and I have self-love. SO maybe some days I don’t feel so great, or I even beat myself up over something I did or didn’t do. Immediately I become aware of what I’m doing, I remind myself to be gracious with myself, and I experience a shift in my mindset. Sustainable also means that no event/ problem/ situation is big enough to tumble me over. Nothing is big enough to make or break me. I am centered and at peace and in love with myself, so all I do is continue to show up with courage, day after day, situation after situation. It doesn’t mean I’m not afraid or I don’t get sad, but rather that fears don’t stop me and sadness doesn’t cripple me. I continue swimming against the current, with courage, and knowing I am being true to myself always, no matter what.
As the new year approaches, I invite you to set an intention for what you want to accomplish, what you want to be different and what you want to remain the same, what you want less of and what you want more of.
Much Love,
Meli
